About my bucketlist

5/18/2017 Syl 0 Comments

My dreams, wishes and plans will be numbered in no particular order. And they will be tagged in such a way that a distinction can be found between wishes which are easy to fulfill and dreams which will always be dreams. I know some people say that it's not done to place those dreams on the list, but I'll do it anyway. Some things have happened in my life I never expected to happen. Those events seemed to be impossible to happen, but they did. Other items are just small wishes and easily attainable in the eyes of others, but they'll never will be part of my life. The numbers will also be used when the items are finished. My bucketlist is not my life's plan, not an agenda. Life itself takes it's course and it has often been different from what I expected. Sometimes life was a surprise, but most of the times it was adjusting to the needs of others, which is the fate of mothers of children with special needs. I have been the caretaker of my grandmother for over 20 years, of my 4 children with special needs during 30 years, and of my husband and one of my daughters the past years. No wonder my heart couldn't cope with it anymore. It's time to live life before it ends, to live it in my way. I'm sorting things in my house, tidying the attic after 35 years of lack of time and energy to do so. Don't think it was just a matter of throwing things away and doing it in a few days. It was like I was glued to the floor. Now I know why... a clean house was a symbol for being ready to die. With my bucketlist I won't have time to die. :) :) :)